Our Little Thing vs Gottman Card Decks: which fits tonight?

Our Little Thing is a free-to-use app that gives you one question a day to answer apart and reveal together, plus games, date ideas and love notes, with a partner, a best friend or family. Gottman Card Decks is a free app of conversation cards from the Gottman Institute.

Use Our Little Thing when you want a daily rhythm and a wider mix of things to do, and the cards when you want a prompt on the table at dinner. This is not a contest, and neither replaces advice from a qualified person. Details about the Gottman app come from its own pages, read in October 2026, and our prices are as of October 2026.

A daily companion or a deck of cards: what is the difference?

Think about what you do with a deck of cards. You shuffle it, put it in the middle of the table and pick one. The conversation goes wherever it goes, and when you are done, you put it down.

Our Little Thing works differently. It is more like a daily habit with a few extras: one question a day, answered apart, then revealed together, and a reminder so you remember to open it. Both are ways to get a conversation going, in different shapes.

The Institute also sells printed decks through its own shop. One boxed set of seven decks goes with its online course, so check the shop for what is available.

What is Our Little Thing built for?

For the people you love, one question at a time. Each day there is one question. You each answer in private, and you see both answers at the same moment. That short pause is the point: nobody copies the other person’s answer.

When you set up, you pick a lane: romantic, friendship or family. So it also works with a best friend or your mum, and each lane has its own questions and games. It starts on one phone, and pairing two phones is optional.

Around the question you will find more than 40 games with 20 or more rounds each, more than 100 date ideas with filters and a plan builder, love notes, special dates with countdowns and a photo memories area. Premium also lets you write up to 200 of your own questions. If you want questions to start from, our guide to questions to ask your partner is free to read.

Our Little Thing is not based on the Gottman method, and it is a gentle tool for connection, not counselling. Please seek qualified help when you need it.

Which one fits your evening? Three made-up scenes

These are invented scenes to show the feel, not real people.

The family Sunday

Your sister, your cousin and your mum are all there. You would like something everyone can join, including a teenager who rolls their eyes at anything labelled romantic. That is where a family lane in Our Little Thing comes in, with its own questions and games, and no romantic questions in sight. Teens can join friendship and family spaces, while romantic spaces are for two adults.

The busy week

You and your partner are both tired and out of sync. A daily question takes a minute, and the reveal gives you something to talk about when you finally meet. Our Little Thing is made for exactly this kind of week. It works on two paired phones, or on one phone passed across the sofa.

The dinner table

You have finished eating and nobody wants to look at a screen. You like talking and want a prompt, not a plan. A deck of cards in the middle of the table fits this perfectly, and the Gottman cards are made for it. For a drive with a friend, our guide to questions to ask your best friend has ideas that need no app at all.

Where are the Gottman cards stronger?

In simplicity and in the name behind them. The app is free, from the Gottman Institute, and describes itself as inspired by the card decks from the Art and Science of Love weekend workshop for couples, with questions, statements and ideas for improving a relationship. The listing says the Institute’s approach is based on more than four decades of ongoing research by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, which is the makers’ own statement.

There are more than a thousand cards, from light to more serious, and you can star favourites and flip between All and Favorites. For a couple who already talk and just want a good prompt, there is no habit to build and no pressure. If one card lands badly, you take the next.

Which should you choose?

Choose Our Little Thing if

• You want one question a day, answered apart and revealed together.
• You want games, date ideas and love notes in the same app.
• You want to use it with a best friend or family member as well as a partner.
• You would like a daily reminder rather than a deck to remember to open.
• You want to start on one phone, with one Premium subscription covering both of you if you upgrade.

Choose the Gottman cards if

• You want a free deck of prompts for the table.
• You like cards that come from the Gottman Institute, and prefer to browse and star favourites.

Can we try both in one weekend?

Yes, and it is a nice easy experiment. On Friday night, put the cards in the middle of the table and take turns choosing. On Saturday, answer the daily question apart and reveal together after lunch. On Sunday, ask each other which felt easier to start, and which led to the better conversation.

While you do it, notice three things. Did you talk for longer with the cards or with the daily question? Did one of you feel put on the spot, and did the reveal help or hinder? And did you reach for either of them again on Monday, when nobody was making an effort? Those answers will tell you more than any list of features. For more dinner ideas, see our guide to questions for family dinners.

Fair comparison note: Gottman Card Decks and The Gottman Institute are product names or trademarks of their owners. JPott Studios is not affiliated with, sponsored by or endorsed by them. What we say here comes from their own pages and public store listings, read in October 2026, and may have changed since, so please check the source before you decide. Lines marked “our view” are our opinion.

Our Little Thing and Gottman Card Decks: your questions

Is Our Little Thing free?

Yes, it is free to use. Premium is $6.99 a month or $39.99 a year, as of October 2026, and one subscription covers both of you. The Gottman Card Decks app is free, and the App Store page lists no in-app purchases.

Is there a similar app for friends or family?

Our Little Thing has a friendship lane and a family lane, each with its own questions and games.

Does Our Little Thing use the Gottman method?

No. Our Little Thing is not based on the Gottman method, and it is not therapy. It is a gentle tool for connection. Please seek qualified help when you need it.

Who makes the Gottman Card Decks?

The app is from the Gottman Institute, a relationship organisation well known for its work with couples. The App Store seller is listed as Affective Software, Inc.

Is it only for married couples?

The Gottman app is inspired by the Institute’s workshop for couples, and its App Store page does not say married only. It is rated 18+. Our Little Thing has romantic, friendship and family lanes.

Are the Gottman cards also printed?

The Institute sells printed card decks in its own shop, and its app is inspired by the decks from its workshop. Check the shop for what is available now.